Hello Onjenoo Visitors!

I am really excited about posting my first article of 2008, “Get Your 2008 Buzz On”, which highlights my high-tech toy recommendations for the new year. Hey, if “Car and Driver” magazine can do it for vehicles, why can’t I do it for sex toys, right?

I scoured the world, as in the World Wide Web, to find the high-tech gizmos and gadgets of sensual pleasure God bless the geeks and nerds. I evaluated 100s of toys based on innovation, design, ease-of-use, consumer reviews and of course, price. Plus, I validated my decisions by personally testing some of the toys.

The products that garnered rave reviews include some from the OhMiBod family; Big Tease Toys, this is the company that manufacturers those vibrating toy bath duckys; The Swedish company (no, not IKEA) Fun Factory; and Je Joue.

Grab a cup of ‘joe’, sit down, and happy reading.

Xoxo,
Zoey

Imagine you are in bed and feeling a little frisky. You dim the lights. You light some candles. No one is around, but you, your hormones and the OhMiBod ‘OMB’. But wait, something is missing. The music. You need music to create the perfect erotic mood. So you grab your MP3 player, such as the one that is manufactured by a company named after a fruit (apparently, Apple doesn’t like having its named associated with sexual devices so I can’t say ‘grab your IPOD or IPOD Nano’), and plug it into your OMB vibrator.

SAY WHAT?

Yes, I SAID plug the vibrator into the MP3 device. The cool folks at Suki created what I consider to be one of the best sex toys in recent years, OhMiBod.

This is the first insertable music-driven vibrator that utilizes microchip technology to transform your favorite music into mind-blowing, orgasmic bliss. The beat of the music resonates with the vibrations of the OMB. I’ve personally tested and reviewed dozens of sex toys, but none have ever provided me with the opportunity of creating a unique and erotic experience that incorporates my music.

The OMB vibrates to the beat and rhythm of your music while you listen. It measures 5 1/2″ long (insertable length) and 1 1/8″ in diameter. It comes with an additional multi-speed end cap for use without a MP3 device. Plus, the motor provides strong yet quiet, intense rhythmic vibrations, and its polished chrome detail and pearl white body make this the ultimate ‘acsexsory’. If you purchase the OMB, plunk down the extra cash for the Pinkie, a
soft skin sleeve that slips over the shaft making the toy look and feel
like a real penis and increasing the overall girth.

Now as if this wasn’t enough, the hipsters at Suki also came out with a version of the OMB that hits that ‘G’ note every time. Can you guess what it is called? The OhMiBod G-Spot.

Both versions of the OhMiBod are priced at $69.99 each and use 2 AA batteries. The Pinkie is priced at $12.
For those folks who don’t have a MP3 player, but a cell phone, there’s the Boditalk.

This clever piece of gadgetry picks up vibrations in patterns from your cell phone and wirelessly runs a three-pattern vibrating sequence that ranges from a small purr to a heart-pounding throb. Another neat thing is that the Boditalk is not limited to just your cell phone. You can use the bullet in manual mode, which allows you to cycle through the seven pre-set vibrating patterns. Thank God for unlimited nights and weekends! The Boditalk costs $68.99 and uses 2 AAA batteries.

From the company that made bath time frisky with the vibrating ducks, Big Tease Toys, comes the Tuyo and the Onye. The Tuyo is an innocent-looking massager about the same size as a billiard ball. Only this massager’s true purpose remains hidden until the small top button is pressed, and when that happens watch out! Each click cycles to a different setting that includes three speeds of vibration and five pulsation patterns. This round beauty has a non-slip silicone grip to help keep a comfortable hold while you navigate it around your body. Plus, it is splash-proof so you can take Tuyo with you in the shower. The Tuyo takes 3 AAA batteries. Rub a dub dub big Os in the tub!

The Tuyo’s sister, Onye is another gorgeous toy of sexual delight. This petite and powerful vibromasseur allows you to select from one of three vibrations speeds or five varied pulsation options with a gentle press on the bottom of the Onye. Made with a non-slip silicone grip on the shaft and attractive stainless steel accents, the Onye is both a pleasure to look at and use. Measuring 4 ½” long, you can easily pack her in an overnight bag making her a great travel companion. Each Tuyo and Onye comes in a satin-lined case and are priced $61.99 and $55.99 respectively. Both use 3 AAA batteries.

From the same country that gave us IKEA, Delight is the latest creation from our friends at Fun Factory. Rechargeable, powerful, and quiet, the Delight boasts three variable speeds and three pulsation modes. Its signatures shape dubbed the ‘Royal Curl’ requires two fingers to hold onto and a thumb to adjust the variable vibration modes and three pulsation patterns. The slightly bent silicone tip targets the G-Spot, while the small “bump” provides simultaneous C-Spot stimulation. The Delight measures 6″ long (2.5″insertable) and provides up to 90 minutes of bliss. Just make sure to charge it for three full hours after purchase. Plus, it comes with a hard plastic storage case that charges the toy when not in use. You can pick up the Delight for around $159.

Last, but certainly not least is the ultimate in sensual self-indulgence, Je Joue. This is the first intimate massager to be inspired by the techniques of foreplay. Its only limit is your imagination. It quivers, glides and swirls over your most delicately sensitive spots in patterns of infinite variation for a truly thrilling experience.

Je Joue comes with 10 or so pre-programmed “grooves.” A groove is a series of motions arranged into a pattern, and when you select a groove and press “play,” the Pleasurepad moves according to the instructions in the groove. You can also customize the grooves and save up to 20 of them on your Je Joue handset using the Pleasureware software that is included. To make sure it keeps doing what it’s doing, press and hold the “don’t stop” button. The range of motion includes up and down, side to side and round and
round. The Pleasurepad might pulse, vibrate, press, pull back, turn and
pause. With enough lube, it feels more like fingers or a tongue than a
vibrator. Each Je Joue handset comes with the Pleasureware software for Windows and Mac, a USB cable, lube and the handset itself. Plus, it comes with three unique Pleasurepads that affix to the stimulator. Select texture that best suits you.

Je Joue is also rechargeable. Simply plug it in after purchase to let it charge. You can store it inside its stylish purple pouch that also holds the Pleasurepads and the charger. Let the Je Joue take you to heady new heights. Of course, pleasure like this doesn’t come cheap. The price for one of these bad boys is $290. But, don’t worry you will get many returns on your investment in the form of amazing Os. Pretend your Stella and get your groove back!